My Family Is Very Odd

“Oh, right, we also found you a tutor.” Young Ghost said while picking up the TV remote.

“Tutor?”

Li Xiao Gui, with her messy hair, stayed silent for two seconds and slowly took off her bracelet.

She put the silver bracelet on the table, sat up straight, and said in a childlike voice, “If you have something to say, just say it.”

“No, put the bracelet back on, go back to your room, comb your hair, change your clothes, and come out for breakfast. The tutor should be here in the afternoon.” Young Ghost said coldly.

“But I want to go out and play.” Li Xiao Gui said in a pleading tone, looking up at him with big, sparkling eyes, full of anticipation.

She had so much fun playing yesterday, and the excitement was still lingering, making Li Xiao Gui eager to go find Chen Yuanyuan and Shen Chen today.

To avoid being charmed by Li Xiao Gui, Young Ghost deliberately didn't look at her. “No, go change. By the way, did you do your homework?”

Li Xiao Gui: “...”

Young Ghost knew she hadn't done it when she didn't answer. He said slowly, “Just take out your homework and do it while you wait for the tutor.”

Li Xiao Gui: “...” She lowered her head dejectedly.

Young Ghost didn't dare look at her, sitting up straight and pretending to watch TV.

At two o'clock in the afternoon, the sun was at its strongest.

A thin man with glasses and a scholarly air stood at the gate of the haunted house. He had been called to perform an exorcism on the child in the haunted house.

Director Shen had briefed him on the basic situation.

Strangely enough, there was a little human girl being raised inside the haunted house, by five ghosts!

Even stranger, he was going to teach the little girl in the haunted house exorcism!

Ghosts asked an exorcist to teach a little human girl exorcism!

This was truly the strangest thing he had heard this year!

Even stranger still, the director had agreed! He even told him to be kind, try his best to teach, not to scare the child, and to get along well with the ghosts in the haunted house.

Since when did exorcists have such a harmonious relationship with ghosts? And get along well?

Normally, shouldn't it be a matter of properly getting rid of ghosts?

Director Shen also said that the ghosts in the haunted house wouldn't hurt people and that he could just go. However, the man was still a little apprehensive. He stood there for a while and finally got up the courage to ring the doorbell.

It was an old woman with gray hair who opened the door. The man could tell at a glance that this was a ghost. To be honest, the man had never tried any other interaction with ghosts besides sealing them. He was a little uncomfortable, bowing stammeringly and introducing himself nervously but politely:

“Hello, I'm Wen Yuanrui, the tutor introduced by Director Shen!”

“You're here, come in. The little darling is in the living room. I'll take you there.” Ghost Granny smiled. She really looked very kind and amiable, if it weren't for the black energy around her, her pale face, and her eyes that were just two black holes.

Wen Yuanrui nodded. “Yes, thank you. Sorry to bother you.”

Ghost Granny: “No bother, no bother, we've been waiting for you! Old man couldn't find a suitable tutor, he wasn't satisfied with any of them, and finally you're here. We'll leave our little darling to you.”

It sounded just like the ordinary parents Wen Yuanrui had encountered when he was a college student working part-time as a tutor, chattering and worrying about their children. You could even say it was no different.

This, mixed with the black energy emanating from her, made him a little dazed, as if it were two cut-off dimensions.

Ghost Granny: “But don't be too strict. If the little darling can't learn, then so be it. Don't be rude to her...”

This was different from the parents of the ambitious children he had tutored. Just as Wen Yuanrui was thinking this, Young Ghost's roar came from the living room: “8+2=10, what is 10-8? Eight plus two equals ten, eight plus two equals ten! I've said eight plus two equals ten, do you still need to think about what ten minus eight equals? Are you kidding me?!”

Little Ghost: “I'm not! Dad, I'm thinking hard! Don't make me laugh!”

Young Ghost: “I'm not! Who's making you laugh! No one's making you laugh! What's eight plus two! Tell me! Don't think! Just say it!”

Just as the father and daughter were battling, Ghost Granny and Wen Yuanrui arrived. Ghost Granny said with a smile, “The teacher is here.”

Hearing this, Young Ghost's eyes lit up. He and Li Xiao Gui looked over at the same time.

It was the first time Young Ghost had found an exorcist so pleasing to the eye. “You're here just in time. Come and help tutor Little Ghost with her homework.”

The young exorcist's heart skipped a beat. Looking at Li Xiao Gui's innocent big eyes, he remembered why he, an education major, had worked so hard to learn exorcism and was determined to be an exorcist.

…

Two weeks later, Wen Yuanrui was bald, thin, autistic, and stronger. He increasingly felt that the haunted house family was no different from an ordinary family of six. Sometimes he even felt like he was facing a group of people, not ghosts.

If it weren't for the fact that the big black guy was always passing through the walls of the house, bumping into things, and the rest of the family always appeared and disappeared…

Today was the little princess of the haunted house’s birthday, and Wen Yuanrui, as her tutor for two weeks, was also invited to her birthday party.

He looked at the gift he had spent all day shopping for at the mall and frowned: I wonder if the little princess will like it.

…

A lazy ray of light shone through the window. Li Xiao Gui, wearing a small apron, stood on a stool, making a cake with Burly Ghost.

Today was her birthday, and she had invited Brother Shen Chen, Chen Yuanyuan, and Teacher Wen to her birthday party. Before they arrived, Li Xiao Gui wanted to prepare lots and lots of delicious food for them.

Li Xiao Gui held out her hand, looking eagerly at Burly Ghost, waiting for it to hand over a large bowl of white, unformed, thick cream. She happily took the bowl in her arms and learned to stir it with the beater the way Burly Ghost had just done.

“Yes, beat in one direction…add a spoonful of sugar…yes, that’s it, Little Gui is so good.” Burly Ghost said, watching Li Xiao Gui from the side. “Wait until you can lift the cream with the beater.”

Li Xiao Gui nodded vigorously. “Okay!”

Because Burly Ghost had already beaten it in advance, Li Xiao Gui managed to whip the cream in no time. Li Xiao Gui looked at the whipped cream, her eyes shining with a sense of accomplishment. “Brother, I’m done!”

Burly Ghost: “Little Gui is so good. I’ll go pack the cream and bring the cake over. You go wash the fruit.”

Li Xiao Gui: “Okay!” She nodded obediently and ran off to wash the fruit.

By the time Burly Ghost came over with the cake and the packaged cream, Li Xiao Gui had already washed the fruit and put it in the basket.

Burly Ghost asked Li Xiao Gui to pick some fruit that could be used to decorate the cake. Li Xiao Gui quickly picked out her favorite strawberries, put them in a glass bowl, and ran towards Burly Ghost. Her face was covered with flour, and she smiled at him cheerfully as she shouted:

“Brother, brother!”

Burly Ghost shouted cheerfully: “Okay, we’ll put the strawberries on after we’ve spread the cream on the cake and squeezed the flowers on!”

Li Xiao Gui nodded vigorously. “Mm-hmm!”

Li Xiao Gui watched intently as Burly Ghost built the cream onto the yellow cake, her eyes filled with admiration. Then it was time to use the cream to squeeze layers of flowers onto the cake.

“Wow!” Li Xiao Gui watched Burly Ghost’s skillful hand movements, like some kind of magical magic, squeezing a beautiful flower onto the cake.

Burly Ghost handed the cream stick to Li Xiao Gui. “Little Gui, you try it too! It’s fun!”

Li Xiao Gui nodded eagerly. As she carefully tried to squeeze the flowers on the edge of the cake with the cream in her hand, Burly Ghost pulled out a camera from somewhere and took pictures of her while saying how cute she was.

“So ugly!” Li Xiao Gui couldn’t control her strength and accidentally squeezed out a lump of cream. Burly Ghost screamed how cute it was and took a picture of Little Gui’s pouting face before going over to help her.

Burly Ghost easily separated the failed lump of cream from the cake with a knife without damaging the cake at all.

It held up the cream that had been separated with the knife for Li Xiao Gui to see.

Li Xiao Gui reached out and scooped a mouthful into her mouth. The cream melted in her mouth, soft and dense, sweet and silky. She looked up at Burly Ghost and said loudly, “Delicious! Brother is amazing!”

Burly Ghost laughed heartily.

The kitchen was filled with their laughter.

After they finished the cake, they started making cream puffs, cookies, creme brulee… Every time they finished one, Burly Ghost would pick one out and fly it to Li Xiao Gui’s hand or mouth to feed her, so much so that Li Xiao Gui was full before the birthday party even started.

By the end of the feeding, Burly Ghost looked at Li Xiao Gui’s round belly and realized it was bad. At this rate, he would definitely be scolded to death by Female Ghost and Young Ghost!

Most importantly, Little Gui could easily get indigestion and stomachaches if she ate too much! And now the birthday party hadn’t even started yet!

Burly Ghost, who had come to his senses, in order to control his urge to feed Li Xiao Gui, told her that the kitchen was almost ready and that it was about time, so he coaxed Little Gui out.

Li Xiao Gui obediently and excitedly ran all the way back to her room. There were birthday dresses in the closet that the ghosts had picked out for her. As Li Xiao Gui put on the dress and admired it in the mirror, she suddenly heard something tapping on the window outside, faintly calling her name.

“Little Gui…Little Gui…”

“Little Gui…Little Gui…”

“Li Xiao Gui…”

She turned her head and looked towards the window, but there was nothing there. The voice was still faintly calling her name.

Li Xiao Gui asked, “Are you calling me?”

The voice didn’t answer, it just kept repeating: “Little Gui, Little Gui.”

Thin, slow.

Li Xiao Gui walked over. She could gradually see that at the very bottom of the window, there seemed to be a tiny, black thing stuck to it. But when she opened the window, it was gone.

There was only a small white rabbit candy outside the window.

ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ

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