A Fake Holy Mother in the Zombie Apocalypse

After everyone finished the spicy boiled fish, they hurried to sleep. As soon as it was light, Lu Xingchi got up and called Bei Nuan, wanting her to go with him to find Shao Bai and Yan Teng.

However, Bei Nuan knew very well that in this kind of situation that required deep and lengthy conversations, it would be absolutely impossible not to say those three forbidden words.

She buried her head in her sleeping bag, her voice muffled, but her tone was firm, "I went to bed too late last night, haven't slept enough, sleepy."

Lu Xingchi peeled her head out of the sleeping bag to let her breathe, smoothed her hair, and said, "If you want to sleep, just keep sleeping. I'll call you when it's time to leave."

He went with Du Ruo.

They were gone for a long time, and who knows what they talked about. After Lu Xingchi came back, he said that Shao Bai and the others had agreed to temporarily not report the matter of several people having abilities.

They were now going to leave Faman City, and Du Ruo had other plans.

He planned to go to Salun City, which was currently under attack by a large number of zombies in the south.

Yan Teng said that the situation in Salun City was grim, even worse than the ancient city of Faman. A large number of zombies were gathered near the high wall defense line a few kilometers from Salun City, and were attacking the high wall.

Bei Nuan knew that Du Ruo wanted to go and help solve the mutated zombies.

"Yan Teng has already greeted the commander of Salun City," Lu Xingchi said, "He will assist Du Ruo in leaving the city then."

When they were about to leave, Bei Nuan reluctantly took out the rifle and returned it to Shao Bai, cautiously uttering only two words, "Thank you."

They were soldiers, and guns couldn't be given away casually, but Shao Bai sincerely said to Bei Nuan, "If you are willing to come to the Special Operations Team, I will definitely help you apply for the best gun."

Bei Nuan nodded.

Persisting in not speaking was the safest thing to do.

After saying goodbye to them, the team left the fortress of Faman City.

Behind the bastion was the range of the safe zone. The mountains were still mountains, and the water was still water, but one thing was very different—finally, there were no zombies to be seen.

Everyone got back into the off-road vehicle. This time, they were heading south, in the direction of Salun City.

Du Ruo sat in the back seat and poked Bei Nuan, "Bei Nuan, why haven't you said anything today?"

Bei Nuan uttered three precious words: "Sore throat."

"Sore throat? Maybe it was too spicy eating the boiled fish last night, and you're feeling the heat," Jiang Fei said, "Bei Nuan, should I make you some chrysanthemum tea to drink?"

Bei Nuan was about to say "No need," when she suddenly realized there was a "no" in it. With an emergency brake in her mind, she quickly stopped herself.

She turned her head back and shook her head at Jiang Fei. Just as she was about to open her mouth to choose her words, she saw the four-plus hours that the "Do As You Please" task had been going well suddenly jump to negative—negative one hour.

She couldn't shake her head.

Shaking her head counted as using body language to replace "no."

The four-plus hours that she had painstakingly endured by sleeping were cleared in one go, and she was penalized an extra hour on top of that.

Bei Nuan sighed painfully.

Du Ruo saw her sigh and asked with concern, "Is it that painful?"

Bei Nuan sincerely replied, "It is."

It really was that painful, not the throat, but the heart.

If only she could sleep again and sleep through these few hours, Bei Nuan leaned back in her seat and closed her eyes.

Lu Xingchi drove the car while reaching out with one hand to feel her forehead, "Feeling very uncomfortable?"

Why were these people asking so many questions today?

Bei Nuan was about to shake her head when she suddenly woke up, stiffened her neck and didn't move, and replied, "It's really nothing, just a sore throat."

"If your throat hurts, why don't you type what you want to say on your phone and show it to us?" Tang Tang suggested.

Of course not, using writing counted as cheating.

Bei Nuan painfully replied, "…Never mind, my fingers hurt too."

Lu Xingchi glanced at her and continued driving.

After driving for a while, he suddenly said to Bei Nuan, "I'll ask you a few questions. If your throat hurts, answer slowly. I'm not in a hurry."

According to the task requirements, she had to answer everyone's questions head-on, otherwise, she would be penalized again.

Bei Nuan sighed deeply in her heart and agreed. He probably had something important to say.

Lu Xingchi asked faintly, "Did you sleep well last night?"

Bei Nuan: ???

Was this question important enough to ask now?

But since he said to answer slowly, Bei Nuan weighed her words while slowly thinking and said, "I slept okay, just a little not enough."

Lu Xingchi asked again, "Your throat hurts, do you want to eat something special for lunch? Do you want me to make it for you, or Jiang Fei to make it for you?"

Huh? Was Lu Boss itching to cook again?

Bei Nuan answered his question seriously, word by word: "I want to eat something light, Jiang Fei can make it."

Lu Xingchi pressed, "Really want him to make it?"

Bei Nuan thought, even if she wanted to give him a chance to perform, she couldn't do it, because she couldn't say the word "you."

She hummed, "Let him make it."

She said the word "him," which made Lu Xingchi take another look at her.

Lu Xingchi drove like this, as if a psychiatrist was chatting casually with a patient to relax them, asking a bunch of unimportant questions.

His voice was steady and gentle, and he asked questions slowly. Bei Nuan wasn't in a hurry either, answering slowly, word by word, and didn't make a single mistake.

Everyone had a midnight snack last night without sleeping, and then got up early today, so they hadn't slept enough. The two of them were chatting slowly, as if they were slow-motion, and they were talking about things that weren't nutritious at all, putting everyone in the car to sleep.

Lu Xingchi glanced at the group of people who had fallen asleep in the rearview mirror, suddenly leaned over, and asked Bei Nuan a question in a low voice.

"Do you like me?"

Bei Nuan: ???

What was he suddenly up to?

She couldn't say "you," she couldn't say "I," she couldn't say "no," she couldn't shake her head, and she had to answer head-on.

Bei Nuan suddenly realized that he was as shrewd as a ghost. Could it be that he had already used that big pile of questions just now to test which words Bei Nuan couldn't say?

Bei Nuan carefully observed Lu Xingchi's expression, and sure enough, she saw a bit of sly light in his slightly narrowed eyes.

Bei Nuan snorted in her heart and spat out three words—

"So-so."

The corners of Lu Xingchi's mouth curved up, as if he hadn't been hit by her words at all. Instead, the interest in his eyes became even stronger.

He continued to ask, "Are you willing to be with me?"

Since he promised last time that he would no longer force Bei Nuan to be his girlfriend, he had never said such explicit words again.

He was not normal.

Bei Nuan was now very sure that he had definitely guessed that she had forbidden words that she couldn't say when she was speaking now, and she couldn't help but answer his questions head-on.

Taking advantage of others' difficulties, this bad egg.

Bei Nuan answered calmly, "Haven't thought about it yet."

Lu Xingchi licked his lips, and then came the third strike, "Do you want to be my girlfriend, or skip this step and marry me directly?"

This was a multiple-choice question. She had to answer head-on. An indirect answer would risk the timer being reset again, and she couldn't say "no."

Bei Nuan's mind raced, and she took his move, "Aren't both a little too fast? Let's talk about it later."

Although he was ruthlessly rejected, Lu Xingchi seemed to think it was still very fun, and laughed while driving.

Bei Nuan beat him up ten thousand times in her heart.

When they stopped for lunch at noon, Lu Xingchi suggested to everyone, "Do you want to play a game?"

Playing games was most in line with Du Ruo's wishes, and he quickly asked, "What game?"

Lu Xingchi said leisurely, "You can't say the words 'you,' 'I,' and 'no,' you can't not answer other people's questions head-on, you can't use body language to replace them, you can't…"

He "couldn't" a bunch of things in one breath, accurately saying all the taboos in Bei Nuan's "Do As You Please" task description.

Even if Bei Nuan really wanted to beat him up, she still had to admit—

He was really strong.

It was simply impossible to hide anything from him.

Everyone immediately agreed to such a fun thing.

Lu Xingchi asked Bei Nuan to give everyone an empty mineral water plastic bottle. Once they said those three words, the punishment would be to be hit on the head with an empty bottle by everyone.

After being beaten countless times, Du Ruo and the others ate this meal in unusual silence, because it was really difficult not to say "you, I, no."

Du Ruo suddenly said, "Bei Nuan, have you been playing like this since last night? I found that the method you used is really good…"

Two sentences with three taboo words, and said more than once, before he finished speaking, he was collectively beaten with plastic bottles.

Du Ruo hugged his head pitifully and changed his words, "Du Ruo found that Bei Nuan's method is very useful, and Du Ruo plans to speak like this in the future."

The style suddenly became cute.

Du Ruo: "Du Ruo wants another bowl of rice, but it's almost gone. Does anyone else want it?"

Tang Tang: "Tang Tang also wants it, Tang Tang and Brother Du Ruo will share it."

Bei Nuan: "Eat rice as you please, be sure to leave a little twice-cooked pork for Bei Nuan."

It was like a group of kindergarten children.

Only Jiang Fei and Lu Xingchi resolutely refused to speak in this tone.

Because they refused to say it, they were besieged by the other three, and a large number of questions were thrown at them.

Jiang Fei finally couldn't hold on and compromised: "Jiang Fei can't stand it anymore, a bunch of perverts."

Because he said the word "no," he was beaten again.

Only Lu Xingchi blocked the soldiers and covered the water, and never made a single mistake, and answered quite fluently.

Bei Nuan quickly discovered the benefits.

Everyone was playing like this, and her strange behavior became not strange at all.

Moreover, she played earlier than others and had much more experience. She immediately transformed from a pitiful person shrinking in her seat and daring not to speak into a domineering Bei Nuan who was focused on setting traps for others and holding a bottle to beat others at any time.

Bei Nuan's painful task suddenly became a game that everyone played together under Lu Xingchi's operation.

But there were also disadvantages.

The disadvantage was that everyone was holding back bad ideas, wanting to trap others, and had to be careful at all times.

When they got back in the car to set off again, Du Ruo covered his head with his coat and solemnly declared, "If anyone hits Du Ruo again, Du Ruo won't play with them."

He carefully replaced "I" with Du Ruo, and "you" with anyone, but because there was a "no" in his words, he still couldn't escape the fate of being hit on the head.

After Bei Nuan finished hitting Du Ruo, she held the bottle and suddenly felt a little regretful that she hadn't been able to hit Lu Xingchi's head all the time.

Bei Nuan poked Lu Xingchi's waist with the bottle in her hand and began to set a trap.

"We've known each other for so long, but we haven't checked each other's household registration yet. I'll ask a few questions."

Lu Xingchi replied calmly, "Come on. Check whatever you want. Ask whatever you want."

Bei Nuan thought for a while, "Tell me, how many people are in your family? How many acres of land per person? How many cows in the field?"

When answering questions about one's own situation, it was difficult not to say "I."

And Bei Nuan was also a little curious. After all, Lu Xingchi's affairs were only vaguely explained in two sentences in the book, and had never been written in detail.

Lu Xingchi replied without even thinking, "My parents passed away a few years ago. I only have a stepbrother who is not related by blood. The relationship is so-so, and there is no contact. As for how many acres of land and how many cows… this zombie outbreak will definitely have an impact, but the problem may not be very big anyway. It's more than enough to support a Bei Nuan."

Bei Nuan: "…"

Bei Nuan pretended not to hear his last sentence and continued to ask, "How about reporting your resume?"

Lu Xingchi replied fluently, "I was in China all the time when I was a child. Later, my parents divorced, so I immigrated with my mother, studied for degrees and took licenses all the way, step by step. Except for studying a few years earlier than others, there is nothing to say."

He still didn't say the words he shouldn't have said.

Bei Nuan was still a little unwilling, "Then what are your hobbies? What are they?"

Lu Xingchi replied, "My hobbies are very simple. What I like most is…"

He looked at Bei Nuan, licked his lower lip with the tip of his tongue, flashed past, paused suspiciously for a long few seconds, and then continued, "…reading, and all kinds of sports."

"What sports?" Bei Nuan asked.

"When I have time, I go mountaineering, rock climbing, and boating. When I don't have time, I play ball, run, and practice boxing," Lu Xingchi smiled at her, "Otherwise? What other sports could there be?"

He didn't say a few words, but he was as slippery as a loach. Bei Nuan couldn't catch him no matter what, and he kept teasing her.

Bei Nuan was a little bored and bit her lip.

Lu Xingchi glanced at her, drove for a while, and suddenly said, "There's absolutely no way you can make me say the words I don't want to say."

Bei Nuan: !

He said all three words.

Everyone in the car immediately pounced on him and beat his head with bottles, not at all worried that hitting the driver like this would cause a car accident.

After Bei Nuan finished beating him happily, she thought that he was clearly the male kindergarten teacher playing with the children, afraid of ruining the children's fun, so he deliberately let them win.

In the evening, the off-road vehicle passed a picturesque hillside.

Jiang Fei asked Lu Xingchi to stop the car, and using the last rays of the setting sun, he set up a table and stove to prepare to cook.

The green grass was like a blanket in the sunset, and the zombies were isolated outside the blockade line. Bei Nuan wandered around to see the scenery with peace of mind.

Lu Xingchi followed soon after.

Bei Nuan was still carrying a flattened plastic bottle in her hand. When she saw him coming, even though he hadn't said a word yet, she went straight to hit him on the head without saying anything.

Lu Xingchi didn't care about her cheating behavior and let her hit him, and hugged her in his arms.

He lowered his head and looked into Bei Nuan's eyes.

"Do you have something to say?" Bei Nuan asked.

He hummed and said word by word, "Lu Xingchi hasn't kissed Bei Nuan in a long time. Lu Xingchi really wants to kiss Bei Nuan."

Bei Nuan: "…"

He wouldn't say forbidden words without using this self-proclaimed way, and suddenly said things like this, obviously on purpose.

His tone was coquettish, but the way he stared at Bei Nuan was like a wolf, and the words he said were too straightforward, making people blush.

Bei Nuan retorted, "Nonsense, when have you not kissed me in a long time? Didn't we kiss yesterday when we were sniping mutated zombies on the mountain?"

"Does a touch count?" Lu Xingchi categorically denied the existence of that kiss.

Too shameless, Bei Nuan was speechless, "Was that a touch? It was…it was…"

Lu Xingchi asked her in a low voice, "It was what?"

Bei Nuan was embarrassed to say.

She was embarrassed to say it, but Lu Xingchi was very embarrassed to do it. He asked, "It was like this?"

He covered Bei Nuan's lips, and like that time, he unceremoniously hooked and pried open her teeth.

Author's Note:

Lu Xingchi: What sport does my wife usually like the most?

Bei Nuan: …Browsing on her phone.

Lu Xingchi: Anything else?

Bei Nuan: …Browsing on her tablet?

Lu Xingchi: Nothing else?

Bei Nuan: …Does clicking the mouse count?

URGENT: Our Google Ads account was blocked due to violations. We'd deeply appreciate your support through donations to help us continue our work. Or we won't be able to continue the translations.

ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ

Love what you read?